Full of roses?

It's commonly said the pathetic to Heaven is not full of roses. Well, I think it is! There might be no red flowers but definitely are stems and thorns. For the last couple days I am paying attention to my food, to how I eat, I do push ups and I squat all day long. And instead of a result,  I see...
Is painful to admit but I am addicted to food. After I had a conversation more enthusiastic this evening,  I was craving for food. Is not that I did not gave in, but at least there is some food left in the fridge for tomorrow. If it would be alcohol instead of food let's say I didn't get drunk tonight,  but I surely was over the legal driving limit, which reminds me: Never, ever drink and drive!
Since I squat and do push ups my legs are sore, very sore and but my chest and shoulders are catching up quite alright. I am trying to be fare to me and to those who read. I do not have a sponsor to keep me loosing weight and I am not spending insane amounts on crazy food. At this stage is all the same, I am trying to keep my eyes and mind open more than my mouth.
My weight today, after I enjoyed some extra low calories carbohydrates last night is 143 Kg. I can do the push ups easier and my squat position is improving.